You’re doing WHAT in your basement?! (Part 2)

More basement adventures…

#2: Bob*

I met Bob a few months ago.  I wasn’t all that interested in him, but figured I needed to “get back on the horse” so I agreed to go out with him.  We agreed to meet at a dive bar near my office after work one evening.  Now, I’m not a dress code stickler, but I think if you’re meeting someone for the first time, maybe you should put in a little effort.  It was late enough that I figured he’d had time to go home and change, so I took a change of clothes with me to work.  So I show up in skinny jeans, boots and a cute top.  He shows up in a gray t-shirt with a stain on the front, ratty jeans and white sneakers that should never be worn off a basketball court.  So far, not going well.

He’d gotten there before me, and aside from his wardrobe choice had already been docked several points.  Men (and women), take note:

If you get to the site of the date before your date arrives, if you’re not going to wait for the other person before sitting down, at least have the courtesy to send a text message that you’re there and already have a table.  I arrived right at the time we’d planned, waited for him for about 10 minutes, and finally decided to grab a table before the happy hour crowd descended and the place got crowded.  I figured he was running late and sent him a message so he’d know where I was sitting and got the response “Already here. Table in back”.  Nice, asshole.  Thanks for making me wait for you for 10 minutes.  Then when I finally found him, he made a rude comment about me being late.

Anyway, back to our previously scheduled program…So we start talking and things are going so-so.  He’s trying to be funny and seems interested in learning about me, but it’s also kind of obvious that he lives under a rock and has absolutely no knowledge about anything outside of computers and computer games.  So I get tired of answering his questions and ask about him.  What does he do with his spare time?  I really should know better than to ask this question.

Bob: well, I’m really into computers.  I have 3 in my basement.  I’m building a supercomputer, it’s pretty cool.  But what I’m really excited about, is the artificial intelligence robot I’m building!

Me: uh, huh….

Bob: yeah, it’s kind of like those robots in A.I.  Have you seen that? Do you know what I’m talking about?

Me: is that the one with the little boy?  Where he’s like a human but he’s really a robot?

Bob: yeah!  You know, when I tell most women about this, their eyes sort of glaze over and then I never hear from them again, but you seem to really get it!

Me: yeah… <WTF?!  I think this guy is building himself a girlfriend!>

For the record, my eyes did not glaze over during this conversation, but Bob never did hear from me again either.

I now have new “get to know you” questions that must be answered before I agree to go on a date with someone:

Do you have a basement? What do you use it for?

*I honestly don’t remember what either of these guys’ actual names are.  I tried to pick generic men’s names.  If I hit on the actual name, it was coincidental.

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